I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love.

For me they are the role model for being alive.

~ Gilda Radner

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

huh?????? Post-Rapture Pet Care????

OK, now I am all in favor of having plan B and covering all my bases, but I think I am drawing the line somewhere before this... besides which, I am sure many dogs will be going to heaven before a lot of people walking this earth... Anybody want to buy some ocean view property here in Dirtville????

Eternal Earth-Bound Pets


You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved. But when the Rapture comes what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind? Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind.

We are a group of dedicated animal lovers, and atheists. Each
Eternal Earth-Bound Pet representative is a confirmed atheist, and as such will still be here on Earth after you've received your reward. Our network of animal activists are committed to step in when you step up to Jesus.

We are currently active in 20 states and growing. Our representatives have been screened to ensure that they are atheists, animal lovers, are moral / ethical with no criminal background, have the ability and desire to rescue your pet and the means to retrieve them and ensure their care for your pet's natural life.

We currently cover the following states:
Maine,New Hampshire, Vermont, Massachusetts, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Michigan, Arkansas, Mississippi, Tennessee, Kentucky, Colorado, Oklahoma, Kansas, Washington, Oregon, Idaho and Montana ... and growing.

Our service is plain and simple; our fee structure is reasonable.
For $110.00 we will guarantee that should the Rapture occur within ten (10) years of receipt of payment, one pet per residence will be saved. Each additional pet at your residence will be saved for an additional $15.00 fee. A small price to pay for your peace of mind and the health and safety of your four legged friends.

Unfortunately at this time we are not equipped to accommodate all species and must limit our services to dogs, cats, birds, rabbits, and small caged mammals.

Thank you for your interest in Eternal Earth-Bound Pets. We hope we can help provide you with peace of mind.

In an interview, the scammers, I mean business owners claim to already have more than one and less than 175 clients. You can read more, here:


Life With Dogs said...

I bet they max out at two! Ridiculous beyond description...so I love it.

Sandra said...

I think this must be tongue-in-cheek!

NAK and The Residents of The Khottage Now With KhattleDog! said...

Maybe Mom and I should work to open the Pawsylvania franchise!


Unknown said...

Stumpy you sure find some interesting stuff. AFter I stop pooping in my diaper, I'll sign up for this one. Oh course thinking of you the entire time. How are you and mom doing? I love seeing the wild horses... any wild shots of u?

Unknown said...

oh Tula is not feeling well and she still has vomit/diarrhea. It's very hard to get her into the car. Refuses to go now although her foot doesn't appear to be a problem any longer. We got a crate, have her step in and them seal the lid over. She needs to be lured by food but now no luck since she has upset belly. Can't get her to the vet. Only 5 mobile vets in town. Any suggestions????? She doesn't like to be "handled" so picking up body parts or lifting is not an option

Malady said...

Jesus Christ on the cross, that's the silliest thing I've ever heard!

tula monstah said...

hi Stumpy- that is some crazYnezz.. ok, yep, sign right up ..for TWO! hehehehe. well bellie rubs & slobbery kisses to you for your concern & helpful tips.ooooo i see your celebrating.. with elk meatballas. drooldrool. wait for me... top notch yummers stumpy! the rough week is o-v-a-h. BIGGGG SIGH...

your mom is right- medical care is expensive but wouldn't do it any other way.

kiss kisses,

Unknown said...

Hey Stumpy
Thanks for the great Tula tips and all your worries. She is doing 100% better now. It was a long week and glad it all worked out.
Hey.. let's see some ear shots from you! I wanna see since we share a great trait.

dreameyce said...

Now what an awesome business idea!!!

I have a bridge to sell them too.....